When Grief Isn't Just About Death

When we hear the word grief, we often think of death — the loss of a loved one, a funeral, mourning. And while that's one form of grief, it's far from the only one.

Grief can show up in quiet, invisible ways — and it often does. You might be grieving a version of your life, your identity, your health, your freedom… even your former self.

The many faces of grief

Some of the most profound grief I see in therapy comes not from a death, but from a shift.

You might be grieving:

• • A relationship that ended or changed
• • A career path you had to leave behind
• • The loss of autonomy after becoming a parent
• • A long-term illness or diagnosis
• • A life you imagined but never lived

These experiences carry real weight. But because there's no official "grieving period" or public ritual, people often feel unsure whether what they're feeling counts.

"I don't have a right to feel this way"

This is something I hear often. Clients will tell me, "No one died. I shouldn't feel this sad."

But grief doesn't need permission. It shows up when something we love or value is lost or changed. Even positive transitions — like becoming a parent — can carry grief.

How therapy can support grieving that's harder to name

In therapy, there's space to name what's been lost — even if it's abstract or invisible to others.

We explore:

• • The emotional impact of that shift or loss
• • Guilt or shame that may be wrapped up in it
• • How to hold both joy and grief without guilt
• • Rebuilding meaning and identity over time

There is no hierarchy of pain. If you're grieving something, it matters — and it deserves care.